It’s time to get honest with all of you. I was going to do Blaugust this year, and try some new MMOs, and try to get back into it. But I’ve been too busy. It’s August 7 and I’ve already gone to Atlanta for work and went camping once. I’m camping again–this time in the Canadian wilderness–later this month.

When I’m free I don’t want to play video games. I want to watch TV with my husband or play with my son. I want to curl up in bed and read until my eyelids get heavy. I want to work on personal projects. I was in my hotel in Atlanta and decided to try out Albion Online and I played it for about 30 minutes before I was bored out of my mind and decided to read some Python blog posts instead. I basically decided to do more work instead of gaming.

Now I don’t know what to do with this blog. It was supposed to be “parenting for nerds” with a gaming/MMO bent, but if I’m barely playing games how does that work? I’ve also been thinking a lot about my nerdiness. Yes, I’m a nerd: I write code and help other people write better code for a living. I love Sci-fi, fantasy, and Marvel movies. But am I nerdy enough to write a nerd parenting blog? I don’t take my kid to nerd conventions, I don’t even go to them myself. I don’t like the idea of dressing up. Costumes are uncomfortable. I don’t even like Halloween.

I don’t think I’m having nerd imposter syndrome. No neckbeards have told me I’m “not a real nerd” for some reason or another. I’m definitely a nerd. But I can’t write blog posts about if you should let your kid play Fortnite because I couldn’t get past the starting screen because I couldn’t figure out how to customize my character. I’ll have an idea for something I want to write and it doesn’t fit here. I’ve posted on Medium, but the platform is terrible for writers unless you want to opt-in to their paywall (I don’t). I wanted to write about my long strange career path so I did that on dev.to. I always have this problem, this I don’t know what to do with my online presence existential crisis.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Cover photo by Christopher Flowers on Unsplash. I searched for “existential crisis” on Unsplash and this was the first result.

6 thoughts on “Confession: I’m Still Not Playing Anything

  1. Probably everyone, at some time. I’m not playing as much as usual at the moment either and it does affect how I blog. When we were all on Topic advice for Blaugust my pull-out quote was “Don’t tie yourself up in knots with self-imposed rules and regulations. Let the content flow. ”

    Blogs don’t have to be subject-specific. For most bloggers, if they plan on sticking at it indefinitely, it’s probably best they’re not. We all have current obsessions, things that we’re focused on, that dominate our thoughts and behavior, but those things change. Locking your blog into one of those can come back to bite you when you no longer feel as associated with or interested in the theme you chose.

    Having written about nothing but MMORPGs for eight years I’m in the process of disentangling myself from the trap of my own making so that I can write about other things as well. It’s an awkward process but once it’s done I’m hoping I’ll feel more comfortable and the blog will prosper from its newfound freedom.

    If you’re doing other things that interest you more than gaming or if you no longer feel comfortable focusing on “parenting for nerds” then just write about something else. The blog is for you, first and foremost, but if you write with enthusiasm about things you enjoy (or can’t stand, for that matter) readers will stick with you.

    And, as I always say, if you’ve had it with blogging, really don’t enjoy it any more, don’t force it. Take a break. If you decide to come back in a few months or a few years you’ll be amazed how many of your old readers will pop up to welcome you back.

    (And the traditional second attempt because for some reason comments never go through on the first!)

    Liked by 3 people

  2. You are playing the game of life. To be honest I would LOVE to hear about your camping trips (plus pictures) and coding and whatever books you’re reading.
    What games are you playing with your son (I was playing exploding cats with my son for about 2hrs the other day).

    Humans are complicated and multi layered so whatever you choose to write about I would LOVE to read.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Ok. Time to turn in your nerd card. Please return it to the guy in the sandals and beard at your nearest board game convention.

    I love this post, mostly because it’s so open and relatable. I haven’t written about an actual video game on my blog (called GAMING CONVERSATIONS!) in I don’t know how long. Recently, it’s been all fan fiction, blogging advice and films. I tend to save what game writing I have left in me for MOP and that leaves my blog with…a lot less. I’d encourage you not to give up entirely, though. There may be a point when you’re just itching to say something about an MMO or parenting again and when you do, you’ll have a spot for it!

    Like

    1. Hey, where is your blog? The link here doesn’t work. I’m sure I must be following it, but I have several places where I follow things, so, I’m not sure. That’s good advice, though. I have other things I might want to put here!

      Like

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